I have been thinking this weekend about the Salvation Army uniform. I wear mine once a month, when heading to the care centre that my corps does a service at each month. I got thinking more this month, however, about the way to wear the uniform. I see so many people who choose to wear it, but also choose to disregard so many of the rules and regulations attached to its wearing. Shorts instead of pants, runners, not done up to the neck, hair down, earrings in and nails brightly painted. Am I becoming religious? I have to admit these things kind of tick me off a little (not that I ever comment on them, as I don't yet trust my tongue or my motives) - if you're going to wear the uniform, let's wear it right! Otherwise, it's not really "uniform", is it?

What got me thinking more about this just this weekend was that I had to go out and buy a retainer for my nose piercing - a small, clear glass piece of jewelry that sits in the piercing hole and is almost imperceptable. Has to be done, because facial jewelry is not allowed with the uniform, and we were heading to the nursing home this afternoon.

So I am asking myself, why did I do that? Not because someone told me I had to (if you've never met me, telling me to do something "just because" is a great way to get me to rebel. If you've met me once you probably know this already.....). I think, really, it was done because I have a desire to live with integrity. I have a desire to have my words say, "I will wear the uniform even to the detriment of what I feel looks good" and have my actions back that up. I have a desire to be obedient, even when I don't agree - if I really disagreed more than just found things inconvenient or lacking cultural beauty, then I wouldn't wear the uniform at all, I would rather address the issues I had a problem with.

I suppose this is the same in many parts of our lives - even our lives as believers. Why do we follow the "rules and regulations" in the Bible? Just because someone said so? Well, actually, yes, but the truth is that we have come to know the person who is giving the commands, and trust Him, and want to please Him. There is a relationship there - one that is of great value and that is built on trust and a foundation of deep love. If someone I loved very much and trusted said, "Bakes, jump off that bridge, it will be alright" I might just do that (and get therapy later). But if someone said, "Karyn" (you already know that they don't know me, because they called me by my first name) "jump off that bridge" I would question why and what were their motives and could I trust them.

God's motives are already proven - He LOVES us and wants so many good things for us, as well as to magnify His own name. But God is not selfish even in that desire. So when God tells me to do something odd, I'll do it. And if my wearing a glass nose ring can prove to God that I choose obedience to Him rather than rebellion in my heart, then so be it! I realize that wearing my uniform properly might look more like obedience to the Salvation Army than to God, but I care about walking with integrity before Him who sees everything and knows every heart. I care about the relationship that we have been building and not about the religiosity of the rules. And if others think they see that I am religious, then I pray that I will let God be my defense and not worry about that.

Again, if you've never met me, that's something I'm still working on.....definitely a future blog topic.....