FROM: Banbury, Oxfordshire, United Kingdom
ABOUT ME: Living the highs and lows of life in the adventurous pursuit of God Himself and of who I'm meant to be as the Bride of Christ.
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Wednesday, July 30, 2008,10:28 p.m.
THE BURNING DESIRE FOR INTIMACY
Why I thought I would have more time for blogging in the summer once school was out I'll never know. It seems I've been slacking on this front. Sorry about that to anyone who still happens to check in from time to time....
Something that has been on my heart lately is intimacy with God. Actually, truth be told, the longing for deeper intimacy with the Lord has been a burning desire in me for some time now. One of the reasons I haven't written much lately is that I've been walking through a rather detailed (and deep) process with the Lord about why my level of intimacy with Him has waned over the last couple of years.
What I have discovered will be of little surprise to almost anyone. I have found (again) that there are two things that when removed to a greater or lesser degree from any relationship affect intimacy within that relationship.
One is time.
The other is discipline.
To make time takes discipline. To have discipline means you have to put in the time. When time is set aside, the disciplines are easier. When the disciplines are invested in, the time becomes a joy - a priority - and it is set aside.
I said to a friend the other day that I was frustrated with my own lack of discipline even in my ability to think about Jesus more than I think about the other things that occupy my thoughts, and have done so more than He for too long. Jesus used to be One I thought about day in and day out - I used to dream about Him and wake up singing songs to Him. Not so anymore, and it breaks my heart. But the more I thought about that, the more I thought that perhaps I have formed a habit of thinking of these other things, and if it is a habit, it may be broken and replaced with a better habit - a habit of gazing at the Lord instead.
That's a discipline.
The more I think about the Lord, the more I will want to (this I already know to be true). The thoughts that come about the other things I do not want to think about as much as I want to think about God must each be "taken captive and made obedient to Christ." As my discipline increases, so will the number of thoughts I have of the Lord.
That's time.
As my thoughts of the Lord increase and my time in the Word, and my conversations with Him, so my relationship with Him will deepen and grow.
And that's intimacy.
In a way I want it all right now - I want things to be as deep as they have been in the past, and I'd like it to be that way now. But the habits that have formed themselves in where my mind spends its time must be changed. Sometimes the discipline that is needed to do those types of things is what makes the intimacy gained so valuable. It's the same principle as money earned by hard work being more valuable than money that is simply received easily or freely.
I don't want cheap grace or shallow friendship with God. I have a deep desire burning in me for true intimacy, whatever the cost. May the Lord help me to make it happen.
Something that has been on my heart lately is intimacy with God. Actually, truth be told, the longing for deeper intimacy with the Lord has been a burning desire in me for some time now. One of the reasons I haven't written much lately is that I've been walking through a rather detailed (and deep) process with the Lord about why my level of intimacy with Him has waned over the last couple of years.
What I have discovered will be of little surprise to almost anyone. I have found (again) that there are two things that when removed to a greater or lesser degree from any relationship affect intimacy within that relationship.
One is time.
The other is discipline.
To make time takes discipline. To have discipline means you have to put in the time. When time is set aside, the disciplines are easier. When the disciplines are invested in, the time becomes a joy - a priority - and it is set aside.
I said to a friend the other day that I was frustrated with my own lack of discipline even in my ability to think about Jesus more than I think about the other things that occupy my thoughts, and have done so more than He for too long. Jesus used to be One I thought about day in and day out - I used to dream about Him and wake up singing songs to Him. Not so anymore, and it breaks my heart. But the more I thought about that, the more I thought that perhaps I have formed a habit of thinking of these other things, and if it is a habit, it may be broken and replaced with a better habit - a habit of gazing at the Lord instead.
That's a discipline.
The more I think about the Lord, the more I will want to (this I already know to be true). The thoughts that come about the other things I do not want to think about as much as I want to think about God must each be "taken captive and made obedient to Christ." As my discipline increases, so will the number of thoughts I have of the Lord.
That's time.
As my thoughts of the Lord increase and my time in the Word, and my conversations with Him, so my relationship with Him will deepen and grow.
And that's intimacy.
In a way I want it all right now - I want things to be as deep as they have been in the past, and I'd like it to be that way now. But the habits that have formed themselves in where my mind spends its time must be changed. Sometimes the discipline that is needed to do those types of things is what makes the intimacy gained so valuable. It's the same principle as money earned by hard work being more valuable than money that is simply received easily or freely.
I don't want cheap grace or shallow friendship with God. I have a deep desire burning in me for true intimacy, whatever the cost. May the Lord help me to make it happen.
