Merry Christmas! Or, as my friend Stephen Court says (and which is probably more accurate), "Holy Christmas!"

Today, I had a Christmas like I have never had before. Only once in my recollection has my family not celebrated Christmas on Christmas Day. We have been very fortunate that though my brother is married to a wonderful girl whose family lives on Vancouver Island, their visiting her family for Christmas has only once rescheduled our family Christmas day, and this is not a problem for us.

Being free from family commitments today, and having encouraged our congregation to consider the Christmas dinner that the church puts on each year as a way to have their Sunday "service," I found myself at the church at 1:00pm, ready to participate in having a time of carol singing and a devotional for those coming to have their Christmas dinner at our place. (Others were already in charge of cooking and serving the meal.)

I was truly blessed, and it wasn't even supposed to be about me. As we sang until we were hoarse (it was too loud to preach, so we just sang the gospel), it occurred to me that I am incredibly selfish. I knew that my family was spending Christmas together on Boxing Day, so consequently I was very much looking forward to just spending some solitude time with Jesus this afternoon.

I spent time with Jesus this afternoon.

Jesus sometimes wears dirty clothes. Jesus sometimes needs to come and be served a meal and to enter a building just to warm up after sleeping on the streets. Jesus sometimes smells of alcohol or worse. Jesus loves to be served, though sometimes people walk past Him, so I'm not sure He's all that used to it. Jesus serves others, and sits and talks to them. Jesus loves to hear His praise, even through Christmas carols.

Today Jesus said to me, "Just seeing you smile has made my Christmas."

I saw Jesus in so many places today that I was forced to weep when I really thought about how selfish I was, that I was rather wanting to spend time alone with Him - what I wanted to do - instead of time serving Him - what He wanted to do. My heart is truly broken apart at the thought and I wonder if I will ever grasp this thing that is so much bigger than I and sometimes seems so far beyond my comprehension. I pray that one day I will. And until then, I pray that God's faithfulness will keep me meeting Him where He wants to be, not just where I want to be.